Another brilliant piece from a GUNNAS WRITING MASTERCLASS WRITER.
Once upon a time there was a young girl who although born in England had no English blood. That girl is me. I am & was that girl. Where did I go from there?
I’m not sure where this fits into the story but this young girl did not know who Coco Chanel or Ivor Stravinsky were. There were so many things I didn’t know. Things like who my father was & why my mother was so unhappy.
My family lived in a world of competing movies. The rugged outdoors man fought the lyrical Irish tenor; they both ganged up against the sensitive artist & the romantic heroine. I watched all these movies play out. The action movies, the horror movies the romantic movies with happy endings but there was no happy ending for my mother.
When I was ten I came to Australia. Every day was the same. I cried. I missed my grandparents. I wanted to go home. I didn’t understand why this was supposed to be good. I didn’t understand why mum & dad fought. I didn’t understand why there were no bluebell woods & no open fires. Or why the kids at school laughed at my accent. I didn’t understand.
One day I was playing outside our front gate & I saw a man turn into our street. I became alert & I felt a yearning I hadn’t known was there. I wasn’t sure, could it be? Yes, yes my uncle was there & I felt how much I had missed him. He laughed & I fell into his arms yelling & yelling Paul is here, Paul is here.
My grandparents came to Australia soon after my uncle & I was happy again. My mother wasn’t. I understood what made me happy didn’t make my mother happy. Now I am here. At an age my mother never reached, still feeling like I’m groping towards something important. Maybe I can learn from that ten year old, she knew what to do.
When you see something you love don’t think, just run full tilt towards it.